“Don’t you miss London?”
A friend of mine recently returned from a brief holiday in central london, which she found wonderful. I had spent some time helping her plan a trip, but never thought to recommend Covent Garden. Israelis love it, apparently. Having studied round that area for years, I suppose I just took it for granted. People often ask us what we miss about the UK. I can tell you honestly, not a lot. Except perhaps that there was no cat plague there. [Here, they are everywhere. And the worst part is we have friends that KEEP THEM AS PETS which gets really awkward as in our mind they are essentially vermin. Clever vermin. That eat anything, yes anything at all, even in several layers of packaging, that we leave outside. Including our dogs food. Growl. Anyway, moving on…]
As a fan of BBC iPlayer, we do have some idea of whats happening back in the Old country. The appalling weather seems to be the main issue on everybody’s minds. [surely a risk one takes by living on an island??!] This is something we don’t miss, although we do miss grumbling about it. Its a handy conversation topic for those awkward moments. Then of course Wimbledon, which we miss greatly. Not so easy to follow with 3 small children – the matches all seem to hot up around dinner time and unless I become a non-parent for 2 weeks, its very hard to watch anything besides the highlights with Sue…. but still managed to catch a few of the best matches without completely ignoring my children. Whats with the girls and the big orange knickers??? Is the idea to distract one’s opponent? Bizarre. Then of course the euphoria of Andy winning. But we got to see the public’s reaction played out in Mock The Week. God bless Dara o’Brien.
Is anyone out there watching the Apprentice? Nope? Just us? Ok then. Well we might be about 5 years to late but we like it. It’s sort of strangely mesmerising. Like watching a train crash in slow motion…. For some reason all the most interesting people are being fired early on. The first lady to go was clearly the most intelligent and articulate. I learnt more about teaching kids phonics from her in 5 minutes on Your Fired than I have have ever learned from anyone else. Nobody truly dynamic ever appears to win. Is this something which is now not wanted in the UK business world?
Whilst looking for something relaxing to watch with my 4 year old, I discovered, Routemasters. A program on London’s buses. Fascinating stuff [don’t laugh, I am being deadly serious.] In all the years I lived in London I had no idea there were offices full of paid staff managing London’s traffic systems. Even after I spent 2.5 years researching a phd on the congestion charge [don’t ask] and actually visited TfL offices. Nor did I realise the scores of engineers working behind the scenes. I was especially touched by the sweet bloke who lives half the year in a portacabin over the Blackwall Tunnel, where he also entertains his girlfriend. Then there was the [Essex, I presume] lady who became a bus driver after her dad passed away and whose dream was to drive a Routemaster [very touching, and Jojo was thrilled to see a lady driver] and yet another lady driver, an Italian, driving a number 58, barking orders at passengers to give up their seat for an elderly gent. There was a very sweet and much abused Vietnamese guy cheerfully repairing a pothole who didn’t even flinch when he was given a dressing-down by some know-it-all woman who told him he had done a lousy job. And several very endearing bus drivers who said it makes their day when someone says hello to them. [I now feel awful for all the ones I scowled at, especially on the 186 route]. But my favourite was the African guy who has the job of repairing the last 11 remaining Routemasters, and who I think must be the original JLB Matekoni of Tlokweng Speedy Motors. [In Joke]. I think this program is possibly the first time I have really missed England since we saw the countryside backdrop of Downton Abbey. I was more than happy for my son to watch Some Strong Language in the spirit of learning more about his cultural roots.
So I suppose that’s what I miss about the UK. Salt-of-the-earth type people who drive a bus, pull sludgy tar out of the Blackwall tunnel every week and happily repair potholes. The people who do these jobs out here are generally Arabs, and what this means in reality is that we don’t have so much contact with them. There are not so many burly workmen with cheery dispositions out here. No get-on-with-it Eastenders [I especially miss those having worked in Ilford for a few years] and most strangely as someone who grew up on the hoody-filled streets of Apex Corner, nobody black. Our yishuv is pluralistic almost to the point of hilarity when it comes to religion, but not terribly cosmopolitan. [Apart from out street, which sports Brits – including a Liverpudlian, Americans, Russians, a Finnish lady, a french lady, a Belgian and a Colombian. Not bad.]
As the song goes, you don’t know what you’ve got til it’s gone.
I don’t really miss British humour, as I can easily access all the TV and radio I would ever want to see/hear out here…. I suppose I would occasionally like to experience a crisp, fresh, morning, but the truth is we do get these up here on The Hilltop. We get fresh air and winds about 360 days a year. [basically all the time unless there is a heat wave]. I suppose I miss being able to go to clothes shops where I might actually consider buying anything. But its a small price to pay. Besides, with small children, when on earth does one have the time, much less the opportunity to get all dolled up???