Politeness
Number of Cockroach Sightings: 0
Number of burekas consumed: 8
Number of houses bought: 0 (still)
I finally managed to get us all to the swimming pool this morning. The idea of being both cool and weightless at the same time was very appealing. We walked to a beautiful pool, which was more expensive than I am used to paying for swimming, but it turned out to be a half day activity. Huge outdoor pool with kiddy pool and places to sit. Lots of space to float around in the warm sun. Bliss. Gets very busy but luckily we were there early. There was the usual traumatising selection of Old Israeli Men with Bellies Hanging Out, but as I now look like one of them I couldn’t really point and laugh.
I noticed that I was the only pregnant woman there. I thought statistically, that was a bit surprising until one lady asked me if my swimsuit was especially for pregnancy. Apparently you can’t buy such things here. So that explains why there were no other pregnant women, they were all stuck at home with nothing to wear poor things.
Our flat-buying saga drags on. Our lawyer (no such thing as solicitor here, everyone is a lawyer, presumably so their parents can say proudly “my son/daughter, the lawyer”) is now asking for a ridiculous selection of documents, going back since the place was built, including registration of the house, drawings, proof that there are no taxes to pay and birth certificates of anyone who has ever sneezed in the building. Everything in Hebrew, English, Arabic and twice in Ancient Greek. Or something like that. And WTF is a “tabu”?
During all this drama I went back to crusty gynacologist. According to local lore, he is one of those marmite doctors that women either love or hate. In other words he makes jokes that women either view as “inappropriate” or, like me, reassuringly informal. He ambled past me sitting there several times (in his work outfit of jeans, t-shirt and sandals) and after an hour of sitting there with a long queue, and watching 2 women wander in with no appointment to ask “just a little question”, somebody asked me what time my appointment was. “5:20” I reply. Jaws dropped open. I can only imagine how many people had pushed ahead of me (people who were not currently homeless and missing out on vital house negotiations I might add). I must have had “mug” or “friar” rather, written all over my face. Still, the 2 women with “just small questions” attempted to push (in one case, physically!) in front of me. Eventually the doctor himself said, in the kindest possible voice, that he had seen me sitting there the longest.
They parted like the red sea for me. (My hero). It was amazing. I closed the door and told him “I didn’t realise I had to push in for an appointment I had already made!” He just gave me one of those looks which I have now realised means “Girl, you have a lot to le arn about this country.” Everything fine, he reassures me. Then tells me that the baby weighs more now than my first one did at birth! He says it’s probably the healthy air in Israel. I tell him it’s more likely the burekas. Anyway, at least it explains why I feel like a such a heffalump.
One Reply to “Politeness”
The ‘tabo’ is the land registry. Properties take veeeeeery long to be registered in the tabo i.e. years and years! You have to check in which government agency your property is registered and sometimes this means going back through all the people who have previously owned the land and see what the ‘comments’ are on how that land was transferred e.g. land that has been assigned over for housing from the government to the construction company to the first buyer to subsequent buyers to you. In fact sometimes it is the case that the construction companies and even previous owners can hold you to ransom before they sign the document to say they passed over ownership which is required to do things legally even if they have no ownership anymore – it’s outrageous and grossly wrong so be very careful about what you sign! Also the process of final registration at the land registry will take some time due to the fact that it is common practice of the housing companies in israel to form a “Private” land registry for an unknown period until the town plan and sub devision zoning plans are changed in order to facilitate the registration of the whole project as separate properties with individual block, parcel and sub parcel registration. In the mean time all transactions are registered at private law offices who issue the documentation for transfer of rights it’s just unbelievable!!
Tip for the doctors and anywhere else you have a scheduled appointment. First thing you do when you get to the waiting room is ask who is the last person there (even if the appointment is scheduled) and say very clearly “OK I’m after you” or ask him what time his appointment is and if it is after yours go asking everyone what time there appointment is until you get to the person just before you and clearly say so everyone hears and point at the relevent people ‘i’m after you and before you”